Tag: review

And I’m Back With Easter Greetings!

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From your friends at the Empire, here’s to wishing you a happy Easter!

Imaged edited by good old Microsoft paint. 😉 You can never go wrong with the classics.

Fantastic News
More than you ever wanted to know about my new motherboard, CPU, and ram.

Last time I posted, I was lamenting over my computer situation. I lament no more! I have a tablet, and it helped feed my addiction to the Internetz, but it doesn’t have all the bells and whistles as a full blown computer. Tapping and scrolling are okay for simple, mindless surfing, but for anything more than that… *pulls at hair*

Elrond taking a selfie with the new goods.

I had a lot of help from my comrade in arms getting all of this installed. I learned a hell of a lot about installation! I ended up deciding to replace the essentials. For less than $400, I have a working computer that is twice as powerful as my old one. I had to give in because I need a computer!

My review of everything is posted below. If anything changes, I’ll make an update. So far I give everything 5/5 happy computers.

I’m still trying to find Photoshop. I found an ancient Photoshop disc from from the early 2000s (possibly earlier!). I want to do some more searching before I install my retro copy. 😉

CPU: Intel core i5-4460 (quad core!)
I could have gone for a beautiful (yet pricey) i7, but I am not running any virtual servers or dummy terminals, and I highly doubt Lord of the Rings Online needs an i7, ha ha! So far this little chip is awesome.  I was terrified of installing it (my comrade in arms did the installation and showed me how to do it). It’s not so scary after all because it’s mostly a matter of “the round peg goes in the round hole; the square box goes in the square hole!” You just put a dab of the thermal past onto the heat sink and install the fan.

Motherboard: ASRock z97 Pro 4
My old motherboard was about ten years old. I had to get new ram (DDR3) to accommodate it. Eventually I will get a new video card (thankfully it has a regular PCI slot). It is a little smaller than the old one, but it still fits in my case beautifully.

I just want to rave about and praise how lovely the bios looks and how easy it was to install the drivers from the disc that came with it. The bios is more advanced than any bios I had seen before. You can navigate with your mouse, and the graphics are a step up from the old blue and white standard.

The driver disc came with a tool set that allows you to easily monitor the temperature of your CPU (among other things). FYI: you want your CPU to stay below 50 degrees Celsius (this is important if you do a lot of gaming or video/photo editing). It also came with Chrome. I am the queen of lazy. With the click of a few buttons, I had all the drivers, the tool set, and Chrome installed.

Oh, and the Operating System install? Within 30 minutes, it was up and running!

Ram: Two 4gig sticks of GSkill DDR3
It’s ram…It’s fast. It does what ram does and fits in the DDR3 slots. 😛

There you have it, more than you ever wanted to know about my new computer setup. I will shed tears when the credit card bill comes, but it was all worth it!

Your Pants Your Way!

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I will never not have something to rant about when it comes to women’s clothing. I will beat my dead horse until my arm falls off, and even then, I’ll find something to hit it with.  This post is meant to be truthful, but most of all, humorous.

This escapade into ill fitting women’s clothing is best read with my previous women’s clothing rant in mind: Hunting Pockets.

I think I am officially giving up on women’s “work” pants. I use the term “work” loosely because designers think our work consists of going to the club and getting our dance on.

There are many women’s office pants out there (no pockets, of course) that are not of the Friday night variety, but they are not my focus today. Ladies with blue collar jobs can’t wear nice office pants.

My crappy five minute sketch says it all!

My screwdriver looks hot hanging out of my pocket like that. I love how the super low, super slim cut prevents my shirt tales from staying tucked in. I mean, I am rocking these boxes I have to move. I have to look good just for you, Box Cutter and Roll of Tape.

When I go to lift something, my screwdriver and wallet can’t contain themselves. I don’t mean to be crude, but these super awesome work pants made just for blue collar women give me a bad case of plumber’s crack.

~Fin
~I hope this gave someone of you a few good laughs.

Hunting Pockets

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I think just about every female has suffered the plight of pockets. I don’t like carrying anything more than I have to, and finding a decent pair of pants with five functioning pockets is like trying to fish a quarter from behind the fridge.

Center pocket taken/modified from a public domain image found here.

Sit down, grab your favorite drink, and enjoy my review of the most common pocket failures in women’s clothing! 

The Gotcha!
While these tricksters appear to be legitimate pockets, they are only a few centimeters deep. Rocking your cell phone in one of these is a recipe for a shattered screen and an empty wallet. You can maybe stuff a dime or two in them. Maybe.

Nope.
It looks like a real pocket. It looks like it’s deep and useful. Just look at the lovely thick threading on it! NOPE. It’s just a decorative slice of denim sewn onto the jeans.

The Slim Jane
Like the Nope, the Slim Jane looks like a working pocket. However, sliding anything other than a coin into this monstrosity is next to impossible. When you do manage to slip something useful (like your keys) inside, it is the battle of the bulge.

Oops, I spilled it again
These tiny seam pockets are about as useful as a cup of water with holes in it. Stuff your change and keys inside, and the second you take a step…Oops.

No Pocket
Lastly, we have a pair of jeans with no pockets whatsoever. The designers were too lazy to sew Nopes and Gotchas, and for that I thank them. I can instantly spot a pair of jeans with no pockets and move on.

MewMew’s Pix – Netflix Gems

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When he is not batting balls of yarn into space or chasing the stars with catnip, Captain MewMew is an avid list maker.

Netflix Gems

In no particular order…(this list was written by a cat, after all), here are five hidden gems to stream on Netflix:

1. The Road (2009) [ R ]
~Not to be confused with the 2011 horror movie of the same name.
The Road paints a grim, post apocalyptic future for mankind as it follows the story of a father trying to protect and teach his son that goodness still exists. It is an adventure tale of sorts when the father decides to head for the shore. Throughout their journey, the duo must escape cannibals, deadly bandits, and (above all else) survive.

Pros: It is a unique story. It shows the love a father has for his son, which makes for an excellent tale in itself.

Cons: It is a depressing story at times.

2. The Awakening (2011) [R]
A renowned hoax detective is hired to disprove the existence of a meddlesome ghost at a boarding school. As you might guess, this is a horror film, and you know how that goes. This one is a jem because it has an interesting twist on the entire skeptic-turns-ghost-hunter plot. MewMew doesn’t want to drop any spoilers, but you will be entertained and pleasantly surprised if you decide to give The Awakening a shot.

Pros: It is full of plot twists, and the “horrors” are done through subtle tricks of the camera. I find subtlety to be much more frightening than shock and awe.

Cons: The stupid romance between the detective and the man she falls for. Yes. I typed “stupid.”

3. Europa Report (2013) [PG-13]
Six astronauts are sent to investigate one of Jupiter’s moons. The movie is done from the perspective of the security cameras and through the astronauts’ personal cameras. This in no way detracts from the plot or one’s ability to enjoy the movie–MewMew admits that it does take a few minutes to get used to. It is sort of like following an addictive, homemade series on YouTube (sans the awful shaky cameras, bad acting, and horrible special effects).

Pros: It has a great story. It is one of those movies that makes you want to join NASA. Last, but not least, there are thrills, chills, and kills.

Cons: Not everyone will enjoy the filming style.

4. Iron Sky (2013) [R]
A super secret Nazi base has been operating on the moon since WWII. The citizens on the base have been living their lives out unawares of modern Earth until a space shuttle accidentally discovers them…Add raunchy jokes, cliche Sci-Fi shenanigans, crazy costumes, and you have yourself one hilarious spoof movie.

Pros: This is a spoof movie that was made for Sci-Fi fans. While it has raunchiness in it, it is not overdone or to the point where you want to just roll your eyes and shut it off.

Cons: If you are not into spoof movies, steer clear!

5. Attack on Titan [not rated]
AoT is a Japanese anime that follows the story of three friends after their world is torn apart by circumstances beyond anyone’s wildest nightmares. The towering walls protecting human kind’s last ditch effort for survival had stood tall for 100 years, but all of that changed when a colossal titan breached the outer wall.

Pros: It is fast paced and has an excellent animation style. If you like The Walking Dead, I highly recommend this anime. None of the females are pigeonholed into sappy love stories or romances that have nothing to do with the plot.

Cons: Netflix only has the first season, and MewMew has a gut feeling that this may become one of those animes that is dragged out over several hundred episodes. Hopefully it won’t come to that…

Warnings: It is subtitled, so if that’s not your thing, you will not have a good time. There is excessive violence and gore at times.

Amazon Reviews

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It’s time to do something light hearted and fun! We’ve all gone to online stores like Amazon, looked up products, and read the reviews. I’ve decided to come up with a compilation of the different types of reviews.

There are regular positive and negative reviews with valid points, but those are no fun! I’m going to focus on the ones that fall outside of the realm of logic.

But first, we need a fictional product and company. ABC Co. sounds good, and now for something to write fake reviews about…

The All Caps Raver
SUPER FAST SHIPPING. MY CAT LOVES IT!

The This-Has-Noting-To-Do-With-The-Product Rant
Terrible service. I cannot believe that ABC Co. is allowed to treat customers in such a poor manner. I ordered this wonderful shirt to give to my daughter as a graduation present. I needed it by a SPECIFIC date. It doesn’t matter if I ordered it at the last minute. ABC CO SHOULD PROVIDE BETTER SERVICE. What had happened was that I took time off of work so that I could wait for UPS’s delivery. THEY NEVER SHOWED UP. Furious, I called customer service, and they told me that all packages are given tracking numbers and that I could easily track the package through UPS’s website. WHAT!?!?!?! So, after that lengthy conversation, I had to open a new tab on my browser, log into my email, and laboriously search for ABC Co.’s conformation email. Talk about too much work! Long story short, I got the tracking number and put it into UPS’s website. The package was due to be delivered the NEXT day. BAD SERVICE ABC CO!!!!! You should pay me for the time I took off of work! Thanks to this poor service, my daughter’s graduation was ruined. She didn’t get her shirt until the day after!

The ??? Netspeak Guru
Dis iz lyk my other 1 ii luv it. Got1 4 my cat ♄♄~~**bo bo**~~♄♄ he luvs it!

The All Caps Bandit
TERRIBLE. DON’T BUY THIS!

The Epic Tale
If the following epic tale review confuses you, go to Amazon and look up “eagle pilot” (The Mountain Combat Stryker Adult T-shirt) and “wolf moon shirt” (The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee).

When I first donned my World Domination Cat and Flying Astronaut Adult Tee, I immediately felt weightless. The heavy pull of gravity no longer hindered my movements, so I decided to take the shirt out for a spin. Best idea of my life! I went to the wild flower festival downtown. People couldn’t help but gape in awe at the awesomeness of World Domination Cat. They could not get over how smooth my movements were (thank you, my new favorite shirt!). The mayor was so impressed with my physics defying dance moves, that he gave me the key to the city. The wild flowers on display suddenly multiplied, and I was thanked for saving the festival. I continued with my dance moves. Gravity? What’s that? It’s just a theory! I just want to say that if you are thinking about getting this awesome shirt, get it. You will not regret donning it. Whenever I wear it, I am the center of attention. Cats adore me, and I got a voicemail from NASA the other day. Next stop, the moon.

Coming next week
Want to make your own awesome space cat picture? Stay tuned! I’m going to post a tutorial on how you can make your very own epic photo manipulation!