Author: grasshopper

Roddenberry’s 200

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If you’re a Star Trek fan or into the sci-fi scene at all, you’ve heard about Gene Roddenberry’s stash of floppy disks by now.

The possibilities are endless. My imagination is going nuts because I love Star Trek. Those of you who know me know that I’m not the 2009 reboot’s biggest fan, and let’s leave my opinion of the ’09 movie at that. So yes, you could say that I’m excited about this find. It could mean a new TV series for all I know!

The scoop on the find is this:
According to CNET, 200 floppy disks were discovered shortly after Roddenberry’s death. Sometime between now and then, they were sent to DriveSavers to recover the documents stored on them (read the article for details). The huge news is that they were successful.

Here’s my speculation (and hopes) of what’s stored inside. Bear in mind that a 5.25 inch floppy holds a max of 360 kilobytes (KB). Yes, kilobytes! [source]

That doesn’t leave much room per floppy for more than simple text files. The final draft of The Year is Now is 302 KB. The book is 172 pages and roughly 74,000 words long (just to give you an idea of what a maximum of 360 KB gets you).

1. Scripts for a future Star Trek series – How can I NOT wish for this? I’m not excited about the rumors floating around about a new series, but if they scrap it in favor of filming one with uncovered Roddenberry scripts? Hell to the yes!

2. A novel or two – Wouldn’t that be awesome? Maybe he wrote some crazy, out-there sci-fi book that never saw the light of day.

3. Scripts for a completely new show – As a writer, I know how it is. You focus all your works on your made up universe, but sometimes you need to take a break from it. I would love to see something we’ve never seen from Roddenberry before!

4. Adulting stuff – Budgets, an address book, records of his bills, tax documents…etc. Boring, but even the best of us can’t escape the bleh that is adulting.

5. A journal – Maybe he blogged before blogging was even a thing. Maybe there are all of these files on there of “Today I had the perfect sandwich. I wanted to take a photo of it.” Of course he had no way of posting his life to the outside world, but it’s hilarious to picture him wanting to tell the world about an awesome sandwich or how ugly the coats were at his local department store. Is the dress blue & black or white & gold?

That’s all I can think of for now.

What do you think is stored on Roddenberry’s 200 floppy disks? I want to know!

Send me your guesses on Facebook or Twitter!

 I’d love to compare theories and eventually find out if we’re spot on or can’t hit the broad side of a barn!

Fifty Years From Now

Posted on by in Fiction, Other Fiction

A grim future awaits us in this flash story of mine. Beware of the $ians, for they may snatch you up!

Original photo can be found on wikimedia commons! 
2065

Grandpa tells me that I was born ten years too late. I have no memory of what it was like before the world lost its way (though, he says that it had been riding I80 to Stupidville way before 2045). I frown as I gaze at his withered face. It looks serene in the candlelight. I sigh. The power outages have been getting worse. It’s been out for three days straight now.

When I see his chest rise and fall, I close my eyes and sit down. Good. I wrestled his mask on just in time. I glance over at the window. He likes to call the deep, dark brown hue “the marriage between a hipster and a trashy sepia filter.” I have no idea what it means, but I always laugh because he likes my reaction.

Sand begins to pelt against it. I rise and close the curtains. I’m sick of sand. It wasn’t this bad ten years ago. Resources were scarce then, and the only reason Grandpa, Mom, and me have a small cabin is because he was some sort of war hero before all of this.

Am I lucky that I’m sheltered from reality? I don’t know. Every once in a while the TV turns on, and we get a glimpse of the outside. The $ians like to parade their wealth by showing us how horrible it is out there. The sad thing is that there are just three factions left these days.

The VAl&ers, us. We live under the military pensions of old in decaying, manufactured neighborhoods–we are a dying breed.

The Fendrz, the ones left the fend for themselves in this mess. Grandpa says they were the working class way back before the world went to hell. They slipped through the cracks and were too poor to buy themselves out of the Disaster of 2045. He says they were always treated like shit.

Then there are the fat $ians, the ones who live in the famed *light City. They come from the upper classes of old or fendrz and VAl&ers attractive enough to be snatched up. Grandpa says that’s what happened to Dad right after Mom had me.

I shudder. Is he some Ms. Piggette’s husband now? Is he doomed to forever shovel horseshit? Mom says the $ians snatch us up to keep themselves from inbreeding. I don’t like to think about it. I keep to VAl&. I don’t dare go near the crumbling wall just outside the forest.

They’ve taken a liking to us in the past year.

Are the fendrz dying off? Have they stolen all the beautiful ones? I’ll never understand the radio broadcasts and government pamphlets we get in the mail…What is so wrong with the fendrz that they’re left in the ruins of the giant cities of old?

Grandpa remembers when the food shortages began and The Smarter You initiative started. He says it was a bunch of fascist bullshit designed to stop the dredges of society from breeding. They got blamed for everything. Grandpa blames society. People used to be selfish, infantile brats, especially with the rise of technology. He says there used to be gadgets for everything. They had bracelets that counted your steps and pocket ‘puters that could access other people–

I don’t know what he’s talking about. I just know that the fendrz are dying off, and we’re next. M@t from the blue cabin has been missing for three days. Dela has been missing for three months. They were the most attractive people in our village…

Grandpa says I’m next.

~FIN

The Force Awakens: My Spoiler-Free Review

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I had my doubts even though the trailers looked awesome. I refused to let myself get excited, and let me just say that I was blown away by how amazing this movie was!

If you are a fan of Star Wars, you’ve either seen it or are waiting for reviews to come in because you don’t want to be disappointed with yet another Hollywood “BAM, BLAM, BLING SEQUEL WITH SHINY THINGS so you better give us your money right now” sort of deal.

If you fall into the latter category, go buy yourself some tickets right now. Star Wars: The Force Awakens is an exciting, action-adventure film that holds up to the original Star Wars trilogy.

It takes place thirty years after Return of the Jedi. The Empire has fallen, but a sinister group called The First Order rises from the ashes while the Resistance has attempted to rebuild the Republic. TFA picks up the pieces for a seamless transition to its own story. I promised not to post spoilers, but here is a list of my favorite things about the movie (in no particular order).

1. The Costumes
They were true to the original trilogy. The First Order uniforms were sleek, 2015 upgrades to their late 70s counterparts. They weren’t drastically changed or bedazzled with a bunch of pointless, distracting bling found in so many sequels and remakes floating around today.

The resistance had fewer changes. You could still see a strong 70s vibe going on with their collars, hair styles, and polyester vests, not to mention the x-wing pilot uniforms did not change much.

Oh, and Captain Phasma has the most badass storm trooper armor and cape I’ve ever seen.

2. Visual Effects
Everything felt right, like it belonged. As I said with the costumes, TFA feels like a 2015 version of the originals. It wasn’t infested with a bunch of lens flares or pointless CGI. For 2 hours and 16 minutes, you are transported to a galaxy far, far away.

3. The New Characters
They were three-dimensional and not afraid to show nitty, gritty emotions. Even Kylo Ren was an interesting character (I’ll leave it at that, lest I drop some spoilers!).

4. The Story
Critics say that it feels like they stole from A New Hope. While TFA mirrors A New Hope in ways, I feel that it was different and unique enough to stand on its own.

I give Star Wars: The Force Awakens 5/5 lightsabers. I felt like I was back in the old Star Wars world that I grew up with and loved as a child. This movie is a must see for Star Wars fans and sci-fi fans alike!

Number 54

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I’m going to be blunt: I could care less about Black Friday, and “I am thankful for…” posts are about as entertaining as waiting in line at the DMV. Does this make me a bad person? I mean, I am grateful for what I have and all…

With all the fear, hype, and false quotes floating around these days about special IDs and compulsory badges, here is a little “what if” writing experiment. I refuse to defend a certain business man gone politician, but he never suggested IDs and badges.

Photo of the DMV is credited to coolcaesar at wikipedia commons

You are number 54. You watch as the ticker at the DMV flashes 52. Good. Just two more to go, and you can hurry up and get on with your life. You shift the paperwork in your hands as it makes an annoying crinkle sound.

53

You double check that you have everything. In the name of security, the DMV wants everything short of a blood sample. Whatever. You just want to get on with your life and go to that new cafe near your house. You hear they have the best caffè americanos.

54

Thank the gods. It is your turn. You hurry up to the window as the DMV clerk yawns. He motions for your paperwork as you are already putting it onto the counter. He flips through it and marks several copies with a red stamp.

“Good,” he mumbles when he picks up the last document. “The amount of people I had to send away today for not providing this.” He looks it over, giving it more attention than he did to your social security card.

He types something into his computer. You wait patiently. You are being served, so there is no sense in being annoyed. I just want my coffee, you think.

“Would you like to volunteer for the Religion Acceptance Project? It involves wearing a pendant or necklace with your religious symbol on it,” he says and leans forward. The bored clerk stares into his monitor as he reads a disclaimer.

“In the interest of freedom and fairness, we are introducing the RAP, a social experiment which allows participants to immediately recognize another participant’s beliefs. The goal is to promote tolerance, acceptance, and to correctly address participants. Participants will receive a voucher for $100 and a pendant in the mail. Participants are required to wear the pendant for a period of six months and will document their observations. At the end of the test period, participants will submit their observations and receive $200.”

Three hundred dollars to wear a silly badge? Yes, please. 

“Yes,” you reply. His fingers click across his keyboard as he submits your information.

“Are you registered to vote?”

“Yes,” you reply.

“Stand to the left. Face the camera. No smiling.”  You obey.

Flash. 

You blink and face him again.

“Proceed to Zone C and wait for your number to appear on the teleprompt. Your license will be ready in ten minutes.”

You frown as you walk to Zone C. Another ten minutes. You try not to be impatient, but damn it, you want to try out that cafe! It has that rustic, cabin-in-the-woods feel you love so much, but would never admit, lest you be confused for a hipster.

You fidget in your seat. Adding your religion to your license was something you could care less about. It was just another item on a list, and the government already knew everything about you anyway. Besides, they were giving everyone a tax break for it. You could use the extra cash.

Your number flashes on the teleprompt. It is time to grab your license and to finally get your beloved and long awaited americano.

When the clerk hands it to you, you frown. A dark pit forms in your stomach as your heart nearly stops. There it is. Your religion. It is listed right below your date of birth. Shaking, you stuff it in your wallet and hurry out.

This is how it begins.

News Flash: It’s a Cup

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I promised myself I’d never post about anything controversial on here, but…It’s a cup.

I work hard to make sure I’ve got the necessities and plus a few extras. There are important things in life worthy of getting upset about, and then there are the petty annoyances like customers behaving badly and chilly rainy days deserving of a complaint here and there. I got home the other day to find the Internet in an uproar over the color of a cup. A CUP!

Is this what we’ve become? A nation who whines and loses it’s marbles over a cup?

For those who are wondering what the heck am I talking about, Starbucks recently released its special holiday cups. Instead of the regular festive designs, they opted for a minimalist approach.

Photo courtesy of Starbucks
Look at those evil cups. They’re up to no good in their plain red dye! The nerve of them. They are the battalion commanders in the War Against Christmas. The ironic thing is that Starbucks still sells its Christmas blend coffee beans as Christmas Blend. 
Elly, Jadelynn, and Major Pierson are all enjoying a hot beverage right now (well, Pierson is stuck on Pluto, so he doesn’t get to dip into the daring blue Yule cup the empire released for the holidays).  Elly and Jadelynn are staring at their bold blue cups. The only controversy there is the fact that they want more!